The greatest game of all time has been long since cancelled! There is chaos in superhero gaming! Untold evil has conquered gaming! The D20 Solaris has devoured all other dice in existance! Darkseid's Marauding Munchkins have added ridiculous amounts of advantages and skills to a simple, elegant system! Amos Fortune's Gaming Complexity Engine has all but ruined a great hobby! Even the once proud Write-Ups has been laid low!
To make matters worse, the comics themselves, once bastions of wildly inventive fun and colorful action, have been crushed by the combined forces of Eclipso and the Dread Dormmamu! Epic tales that never end and cross over into fifty-two titles a month (all of which cost four bucks) have become the norm in the Age of Crisis, Crisis, Crisis, Spam, Crisis! They have turned a once maniacally diverse list of titles into endless clones of Frank Miller's Batman and Alan Moore's Everything! Darkness is everywhere! Grit gets into everything! Even Superman has gone monotone and grim!